Wednesday, June 15, 2005

Real men punch raw meats

Looking for an excuse to not write my novel Trolling through a comics blog, I came across a prompt asking, “What’s wrong with this picture?”

Here’s what I came up with:

“That one guy is wearing a pink jacket while at the same time sporting very butch facial hair. Totally ill-matched.

And that Colin Powell clone in back seems rather impressed with Mr. Pink's delts, which is not so much wrong as it is bad timing. Leave it for the barracks, soldier, and don't ask, don't tell!

Finally, is that a woman in the background, or a 13-year-old boy?”

Here’s the answer, according to the blog:

“Such yellow stripes on the ends of sleeves are Navy insignia, not Army. (Though it looks to me like he's alternating between Admiral and Vice Admiral.)

And the general should be wearing some stars, probably four, on each shoulder”

So, the real answer concerns proper military insignia, meanwhile I’m going on about pink jackets and well-developed delts…

Jeez, I gotta start watching sports, eating red meat, punching stuff—something!

Maybe if I watch ESPN while hitting a side of raw beef, then CHEW on the bloody carcass during commercial breaks, that’ll get the testosterone pumping again.

(But, honestly, Mr. Pink’s hair is right out of 1985. Hello, Teen Wolf!)


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